Teesie, this one's for you...

Feeling slightly under the weather, I have taken a few days off of work... this allows me to pick Dylan up from preschool... For Dylan this is a huge treat as we always do something fun when I pick her up. So yesterday we went to Baskin and Robbins and she walked along the newly built ledge that allows the shorties to pick their own flavors. Dylan tried quite a few flavors with the "little spoon" before settling on sprinkle cake. As she ate her ice cream, she talked my ears off... "we should do this two times mom" " can you pick me up this many days (with three fingers raised)" and when I told her we would just do this sometimes on special occasions she responded, "okay, just on special times". So as we ran a few errands, we were driving by the library and Dylan told me she wanted to get a book... so in we went. She was talking all the way... "let's get a book about ducks mom, what did the mother duck do (I think she must have sang that song at school that day)" So we went in and picked a video and three books... Dylan played Barney on the computer and did not want to leave. She went to the magazine rack and found me a People magazine and a runner magazine and told me to "sit down and read mommy, it's the library" so that I did. As I read, she went and sat at every chair at every table in the children's section reading her book for awhile in each seat. She greeted every adult and child in her new seating arrangement. She was so cute... and mom, she didn't want to leave the library...

So last night, she wanted to read all of the books we checked (all three - I have learned don't check out more books than can be read in one sitting). Her new favorite? Don't let the pigeon ride the bus... I had never read these before, Dylan was beside herself giggling... we read it five times... and she is such a softy, by the third page she was already saying "yes, he can drive the bus" Too funny - the giggling even when she new what was going to happen next... in fact the anticipation giggling was the most fun...

Where was Tyler? At grandma's house doing homework on grandma's computer (she has a working printer)... So, here is an informal poll, we have a family vacation to Indian Wells to watch the BNP Paribas Tennis tournament over spring break... Tyler does not want to go, she is asking if she can stay at her grandmother's house. I am thinking she should go and be with the family - do I force her to go so she can torture me with her attitude throughout the week or force her to go and hope she can have some fun and make the best of the time as a family or do I let her stay with her grandmother? Tricky question for me, but I bet you all have an easy answer (or non-answer probably from some of you)... and no fair saying "you have to decide that one Kerri"...

I think I need to go see a movie...

The weather is going between rainy and Arizona sunshine... The girls are stuck between wanting to be outside and wanting to hibernate... only when it rains they want out and as it clears up they cry about our encouragement to get outside... go figure - Kirk thinks it is a girl thing (being contrary) he stopped short of saying they got it from me :). We had a busy week, seemed to be constantly running from one thing to the next... Tyler has three "fs" so she is grounded... she can get it done, she just loves her friends and now I am finding out that some of her friends - best friends - that I assumed were girls are actually boys... when she talked about "Maddy" she was really saying "Matty" and "Dani" is really "Danny"... these are the friends she hangs out with the most... I feel as lost as Bernie Mac on his silly sitcom America... Tyler doesn't seem to mind being grounded, she gets her work done and then veg's out on her cell phone... a few extra chores, but seriously, it is more of a punishment for Kirk and I as she sulks around dragging her feet and saying "what, what, what" " quit looking at me"... Dylan has realized how to dress herself... she discovered her ability to do this "all by myself" two days ago... this weekend, she has changed clothes at least four times each day... and she is thorough, she does not just change part of an outfit, she strips down bare naked and announces to all she is going to change then starts over from scratch... very cute... Must be why I am so happy... not because she can dress herself... but because I do have two pretty cute kids... they balance out any stress with full blown cuteness and joy...

On another note to keep you all informed... I did not get chosen to be the principal. They actually didn't chose either of us... with our district's dismal financial situation they decided to take a district level administrator (assistant superintendent) and name her as a the principal for a year... all in a day's work... to be honest, I still have a job, I know my job well and I make a pretty decent impact on our school community where I am right now, so maybe when it opens up again I will put my hat in at that time... it was a good experience to interview and it built up my confidence in the contributions I do and can make... It just wasn't my time :) So with that, I just got back from my run... it is pretty late, I procrastinated all day... and we are off to Target and a movie... the date night of busy parents - target and a movie (maybe Kevin can use that concept in a commercial)... I think we will see "He's really not that into you" of course then I will have to read the book which will most likely be more funny but the commercials alone have sold me on this movie... Kirk says it reminds him of me when I was in college... :) but that is a whole different blog... Bye for now...

Writing letters is hard work when you are three. With Valentines Day just around the corner, Dylan has a lot of work to do with all of her friends, relatives and cousins to think about... She is really into coloring lately so it is a good thing her Poppy and Teesie got her stocked up on coloring books and crayons at Christmas time... she has plenty to keep her busy... There is something very peaceful about watching her color and write... she is just too cute... 

The Big Interview

Well, as you know I am in the process of interviewing to take on the role of principal at my high school... so I had my second interview on Friday afternoon... We were interviewed by two members of the Board... in retrospect, knowing what I do about each of the two, I am not surprised things shook out as they did... Anyway, I had a good time in the interview, questions were fine and they avoided completely the issue of my not living in the community (in the past that has been a ginormous issue for some)... so I walked out of the interview to see my friend the associate superintendent hanging out and waiting with the other applicant (at this point there are only two of us left in the running)... He smiled a "hi" my way and I gave him a high five only to point out that he must have come to my school that morning to see what I was wearing as he had copied me... I went out and bought a new gray suit (size 10 - I am so excited) and a stylish pink shell along with a cool belt.... I wore it all day... so anyway I know he must have come to see what his competition was up to as he showed up in gray pants, a pink shirt and maroon tie... as you can see in the picture we were both trying to add subtlety to our large and dominant personalities with these muted colors... at least the photo shoot distracted him prior to his interview :)... I hung out with my friend the associate superintendent to find out at the end of both interviews they still cannot make a decision between he and I so we will in fact each have another interview and this time it will occur in front of the entire school Board... this is actually fine as there is a slight bit of controversy about this contest, and ultimately the Board has to approve the next principal, so why not let them choose... Don't know when that will be, but I will let you know... The picture of me and Steve was taken after my interview and before his... we both look happy enough :)

Haircuts, teasing, and another week slipped away...

Well, the beauty queen you see here went to "great clips" for a hair cut on Saturday and had a ball. She got her hair shampooed, cut, and styled with a lollipop to keep her busy while she waited for her sister. Now that we can see her eyes, she is cuter than we remembered. Of course a new hairdo requires new accessories... so off we went to the store to buy barrettes -  if two barrettes are good why not all six in your hair at the same time? Since she is the "queen" she wore six wonderful barrettes all day... 

Dylan was so funny while she was waiting for Tyler to have her hair cut, she didn't mind chiming in with her 10 cents on the situation... the stylist was having a heck of a time getting the tangles out of Tyler's hair (dreadlocks were forming - really - hence the haircut)... so the stylist made a comment wanting me to notice the mess and the 20 minutes it was taking just to get her hair ready to cut, I let her know I would make sure she had a decent tip while laughing... and Dylan said "mommy didn't want to yell at Tyler today"... so funny and true at the same time... Tyler has monstrously thick and long hair and does not take very good care of her hair... so when I help wash and comb her hair periodically (because it drives me nuts) we generally get into an argument because it is a gigantic mess... so Dylan was right on target and not shy about repeating that to strangers :).  So, Tyler decided on a shorter layered cut... she is not excited about pictures so I can just describe that it is flippy and falls at its longest right at the shoulder... long enough still for a pony tail and the very trendy comb over bangs... all the rage with the preteen set... So, my girls are now stylin'... and as you can see, Dylan will pose for the camera at a moments notice...  

To change the subject, I will tell you about Dylan's teasing streak... not sure where that came from, but she gets the whole concept of teasing her mother. Every now and then I fish for the loving comment and/or declaration of adoration towards mommy... so I thought I had the fail proof fishing lure... "Dylan, who is your favorite mommy?"... my little smarty pants looked at me with her spunky little twinkle and said, "Daddy is my favorite mommy! hehehehehehehe" and then we got to hear that all day, "Daddy is my favorite Mommy hahahahahah!" She finds herself so amusing, and so does her dad! 

I am not sure how time has come to speed up lately, the weekends get her much quicker than I expect... I think I am ready for a day off in the near future... We are headed to Palm Springs/Indian Wells in March so I think I can hold off for that... Of course Tyler is not looking forward to to the trip unless she can bring a friend... four days away from home with her family at a tennis tournament is about as exciting as a plate of spinach for her... she would rather starve :)! Luckily, Kirk is coordinating with some friends of ours that have a couple of kids Tyler likes to meet us out there, so she will choose to be a part of our family adventure... She might even have some fun , but I won't dare suggest it... the last time I commented she looked cute in her outfit, she yelled at me, "mom stop it, now I have to go and change!" I thought wow, I can't win for losing here... I am sure my mom will get a smile out of that experience as she might hold onto some similar exchanges with a much younger version of me :). Talking to a preteen girl is a slippery slope - moms can't win so sometimes I just have to ask myself how far down the slope I want to fall - other times I just want her to change because I don't want her to leave the house in the outfit and don't want her to know I hate it or she will wear it every day... (so I tell her cool she looks - mom saying cool is the kiss of death to anything in the room)  LOL - manipulation is not all bad right?

Finding the past just in time...

As you know, I found and met members of my birth family about a year ago. There have been ups and downs with different members of this family over the past year, but for most of us there is a connection we made, a bond that represents caring in a way that fills the holes we each had in our lives for different reasons.

In talking with my brother and aunt today, I learned my birth mother's cancer has spread to her spinal fluid, brain fluid, and bones. They will be trying some sort of treatment the beginning of next week, if this doesn't work or if she does not respond well there is about a three month guesstimate for her to live...

When I first heard the news, I had no reaction other than feeling sad for my brother. I know that his mother is all he really has in terms of his history, memory, and family. The rest of us care and are here for him, but I realize for him this is so very sad and scary - his memories of her are not the best, but she is his mother and he loves her.

My mom asked me how I felt, I sort of felt at the time like I felt nothing... but I am sad, not really sure why. I am glad I took the opportunity to meet my birth mother a year ago. We had our bad experience (from my perspective) but it is sad knowing that she is going to experience pain, maybe fear, and I worry most that she does not forgive herself for anything she perceives as bad in her life- she does not seem to be very forgiving of herself and that worries me for anyone facing death in close proximity. I am not sure, what if anything I should do or say as I am not a happy memory for her.

I do not understand why things happen the way they do and feel badly that I cannot help my brother deal with his sadness - I can listen and that is about it, I don't even have a lot to say... I am crying but not really sure why... I found them in time and believe that maybe I am supposed to help my brother not feel so alone - he wants to come out and visit after he has resolution about what is going to happen with his mother. I am rambling a bit... trying to process this information... she didn't raise me, but she made sure someone did... she and I did share some honest frank moments and the long awaited hug that occurred only after a three day visit... only to be followed by a horrible phone call making me think I should have left her alone... I thought I forgave her, but I think my tears are because I have to forgive her and talk to her again... for some reason, that scares me a little bit... it is easier to be mad or hurt and ignore the situation...

When did my big girl grow up and out of her mom?

Okay, I am not sure exactly when this happened, but it happened... Tyler and I went from being uber close to me being an outsider - the following pictures depict my attempt at capturing innocent footage of my Tyler in her natural habitat... a messy room on the phone and computer at the same time... She asks us to paint her walls and covers them in magazine photos... she gave me the foot - it could have been worse... I'd rather the foot than the finger. On a serious note, Tyler is doing well - enjoying her social life. In the seventh grade what is more important than girl friends and boys? School dances and the mall run her life and make it real easy to decide on consequences - nothing speaks louder about doing what you are supposed to do than the idea of "everyone" yes "everyone" but you being at the mall - I vaguely remember the idea of "everyone" which generally means at least one other person :)... There are boys in the horizon, they appear at every mall trip and call and text pretty frequently... she is pretty top secret most of the time, but we are pretty sure there isn't A boy, just many cute boys... but she did come home quite happy from the last dance - (dad was worried, I didn't really notice)... Enjoy the photos of Tyler and realize this is about what we see of her, she is a recluse unless you are 11-13, have money to give, or appear famous...Gotta love the girl... she is personality plus on her worst day and a gem on her best...